From Atheist to Believer

by Timothy A. Steward, Ross Correctional Institution

Winner of the Opening Doors® 2005 Writing Competition

When I first attended Opening Doors® it was fun and interactive, but it really didn't change much of my behavior at first. It just didn't have a lot of impact. Two or three weeks later I attended another program called Kairos. During this program I truly realized the impact Opening Doors had on my life. After Opening Doors I more or less went back to being the same way I was before. And I wrote Opening Doors off as a wonderful experience. Occasionally seeing some-one I went through the program with and saying hi. I really didn't take anything I noticed with me except those acquaintances I met during the program. Then two to three weeks later I attended Kairos and that is when I would realize the real affect Opening Doors had on my life. Kairos is a four day long religious retreat. You got fed and got to eat all the cookies you could, so I went. In Opening Doors when asked what someone wouldn't know about me after meeting me for the first time I revealed that I was an atheist. Once again I revealed to the people in Kairos that I was an atheist. Now this is important because I was proud to be an atheist. In both instances I told Christians that I didn't believe in their god, yet there was no judgment in the eyes of those I told.

During Kairos I felt what I now know to be the Holy Spirit pulling on my heart strings. I fought it and actually made it go away a couple of times, but after a few days I couldn't deny that what I was feeling was in fact the Holy Spirit. I had read the Bible and a lot of other literature that strengthened my belief that Jesus Christ was not the Son of God and that there really was no god; just us and possibly other life somewhere else in the universe. That knowledge could not shelter me from the Holy Spirit, so I got saved and yet again picked up more books that held evidence for God and Jesus Christ. I am now proud to say I'm a born again Christian. I truly believe with all my heart and soul that Opening Doors planted a seed that was later watered to bring me to my Savior. This changed my life significantly. When I started my walk with God I realized how I was living and as I get closer with God I stop my old habits. I now use a lot of skills that I was taught in Opening Doors--skills that I wouldn't have already had. The change is hard, but I struggle a little less each day. I try not to judge people and I actually give people a chance to show me who they are before I label them untrustworthy. And I have used my skills from Opening Doors when faced with a confrontational person. I'm not perfect, but I'm definitely a work in progress. In conclusion Opening Doors plainly and simply made me a better person and I look forward to opening more doors. ♥